Crochet humor :)

What did the little crocheter dress up as for Halloween? Answer: Captain Hook, of course! 

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What happened to the cat who ate a ball of yarn? Answer: She had mittens! 

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Why do spiders spin webs? Answer: No one's ever taught them to crochet!

​What do you call the steps it takes to learn to crochet?Answer: A chain of events! 

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What did the invisible man make when he learned to crochet?Answer: An afghan like you've never seen! 

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What did the crocheter say when her doily thread got tangled up?Answer: "I guess that's what happens when bad strings happen to good people"! 
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Wool is a favorite material to use in yarn, and everyone knows that wool yarn comes from sheep. But do you know how many sheep it takes to make a whole sweater? Answer: None, because sheep can't crochet!

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What do new knitters and Christmas trees have in common?They both drop their needles a lot!

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A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife’s bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents. “When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily.”

“The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious doilies were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.

“Honey,” he said, “that explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?”

“Oh,” she said, “that’s the money I made from selling the doilies.”

A piece of yarn walks into a bar and orders a beer, but the bartender snarls, “We don’t serve your kind here!”. The yarn is forced to leave. While sitting on the curb feeling sorry for himself, the yarn is suddenly hit with a brilliant idea. Working quickly, he ties himself into a knot and unravels his ends. Taking a deep breath, the yarn marches back into the bar and orders a beer.“Hey!” says the bartender. “Ain’t you that piece of yarn I just threw outta here?”“Nope,” replies the yarn, “I’m a frayed knot.”

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So this lady was driving down the highway crocheting as she drove. A highway patrolman noticed her and began pursuit. He drove up next to her car, rolled down his window and said,"pull over!" She replied," no it's a scarf.